It's Not [Always] About You!

 “It’s odd that you can get so anesthetized by your own pain or your own problem that you don’t quite fully share the hell of someone close to you.” Lady Bird Johnson. 

The above quote gave me reason to reflect on my actions.  Within recent times, I’ve been facing some challenges and was tempted to feel sorry for myself.  However, as I remembered a friend who was mourning the passing of her beloved father, another whose lupus had flared up and yet another thrust into the position of taking care of his 90-year old father.  In the grand scheme of things while what I was going through was traumatic, others close to me were going through situations which were just as traumatic and even more in many instances. 

The Apostle Paul gave an excellent example of putting suffering into perspective in his first letter to the church at Corinth – “The temptations (tests/trials) in your life are no different from what others experience.  And God is faithful, He will not allow the temptation (test/trial) to be more than you can stand.  When you are tempted, He will show you a way out so you can endure.” (1 Corinthians 10:13 NLT)  Who better to speak to helping others while undergoing trials than Paul?  He was in prison awaiting execution, yet concerned about the wellbeing of souls of others – writing letters to his congregations and pastors.

So, what do we do when we have trials and others close to us are undergoing trials also?  As for me, I listened to my friend as she recalled memories of her father and researched some homeopathic information about lupus for my other friend, while I gave the other tips on finding a good care-giver for his dad.  We all have to be creative to let others know that we care when they are facing trials.  It might be as simple as listening (no advice necessary), sitting quietly holding the person’s hands or even crying with them.  The wonderful thing is that when we do this, we forget our own trial and it seems small in comparison to when we focus on it.  When I eventually had time to deal with most my pressing challenge, my perspective was different and I was better able to navigate towards a solution (even if not permanent).

What can you do for someone today?  Philippians 2:4 tells us “Don’t be obsessed with getting your own advantage.  Forget yourselves long enough to lend a helping hand.” (MSG)

It’s my prayer that we do not become so anesthetized with our own concerns that we miss the tsunami in the lives of those close to us.  I’m just thinking . . .